Conversations

Sunday, 31 May 2009

A First Date Joke

A boy is about to go on his first date and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice.

The father replies, "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family and philosophy."

The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time. As the boy's nervousness builds, he remembers his father's advice and chooses the first topic.

He asks the girl, "Do you like potato pancakes"?

She says, "No" and the silence returns.

After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list.

He asks, "Do you have a brother"?

Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.

The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father's advice and asks, "If you did have a brother, do you think he would like potato pancakes"?

Sunday, 4 January 2009

Proverbs

Between the devil and the deep sea

To choose between two equally bad alternatives in a serious dilemma.

Where there's a will there's a way

When a person really wants to do something, he will find a way of doing it.

A burnt child dreads fire

A bad experience or a horrifying incident may scar one's attitude or thinking for a lifetime.

First come, first served

The first in line will be attended to first.

Drinking Beer

It is commonly said that beer is an acquired taste, and it's true. Anyone who enjoys Barley Wine can tell you, the taste must be acquired. To enjoy such strong and bold beers requires an experienced and trained pallet.

* How does one train their pallet?
* How can you "acquire" a taste for beer?

By drinking beer of course, but there's more to it than that. Every beer lover knows someone who hates beer, and it might be hard to understand why, but it's simply inexperience. This step-by-step guide will help you convert people into devoted beer drinkers.

Before you Start

Before we get started, there are three things that you will be need:

* A beer hater (with an open mind)
* Time (measured in nights of drinking)
* Plenty of Beer (or a good Beer Bar)

Saturday, 12 April 2008

Going crazy

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.

Monday, 4 February 2008

Math Anxiety

My daughter Naomi has been a good, solid student since she started school except for one subject. Math. In elementary school she just made it, but as soon as she started high school this issue became critical.

Here in Canada the passing mark is 60%. Naomi came home with a 60% on a good day. Usually it was far below, which meant summer school and tutoring a few times a week for the past years. Having seen these math results since grade 1, we assumed that math was just a weakness and did our best to encourage Naomi when she came home with yet another awful test result.

One day her tutor mentioned to me, that she could not understand why Naomi constantly failed. In her opinion my daughter knew her material very well and was able to solve all the problems she gave her at home. To me the only answer could be test anxiety.

I decided to tap with Naomi on Math test anxiety. We started with these set up phrases using the shortcut version.

Even though I really hate Math…

Even though Math is the worst subject in the world…

Even though I am sure I will write another bad test…

Even though I am so angry with myself, because my Math tests are awful…

Even though I am afraid Mom and Dad will be disappointed about another bad test result…

Once the level of intensity on these issues where down, I had Naomi visualize herself sitting in her classroom, seeing her math teacher come in handing out the test. This brought up new intensities and we tapped on,

Even though I am so afraid of blanking out and forgetting all that I have learned...

Even though I feel the anxiety of my classmates and that makes me nervous...

Even though I am nervous there might be a trick question…

Even though I get anxious when the others start handing in their tests before me…

Even though I am afraid they will laugh at me when I make a mistake…

At this point I asked Naomi if anybody ever laughed at her because she made a mistake in math and she remembered an incident when she was in Kindergarten. She was 5 years old and had to count little "Barney" dinosaurs. Naomi could not count to 100, the whole class made fun of her and laughed, and she felt very embarrassed. I was elated we found this issue and we tapped on,

Even though I was so embarrassed when everybody laughed at me because I could not count to 100 at the age of 5...

We stopped the tapping here, however I advised Naomi to go to the washroom and tap for a few minutes before the next test. (She would have never tapped in front of the class)

Naomi is now in Secondary 3. She is attending a Math and Science school. You can imagine my joy, when she told me last week, that Math is now her favorite subject. The last term her tests averaged between 75% and 85% and she is helping her friends in school when they are stuck in Math.

Sunday, 25 February 2007

Meeting People At College

It is actually considerably easier to meet new people and maintain a decent level of popularity. In my opinion being popular simply means that you have many friends and that people don't hate you or look down on you. This is different from being famous, which is when everyone knows who you are, but no one could care what happens to you. The easiest ways to maintain friends is be honest and not insult anyone, this means that is you loose money gambling you pay up. (yes, I am referring to Weiner for those of you who know what I am talking about). This will prevent most people from disliking you. Of course it is easier to make friends if you have a good sense of humor, and know when to talk and when to shut up, but as long as you remain a nice helpful person, people will like you. It is also helpful to be able to talk about nothing and B.S. when you meet someone new.

It is also very easy to meet new people, all you have to do is walk up to someone and introduce yourself. I know this sounds crazy, but I've seen it work many times. One time me and a couple of guys joking around and we dared someone to go up to this random girl, talk to her and ask her if I could take their picture together, and she agreed. Right there, a conversation was started. Another time at the U of I orientation me and a group of people were sitting and talking and people frequently came up said hey can I join you, and they came and joined us. Granted people usually came pairs or small groups (as it is easier to introduce yourself to others when you have someone you know), but you can just as easily walk up by yourself and introduce yourself. This will be especially true for people going to college next year, no one will know anyone and people will often be grateful if you simply introduce yourself and start talking. This is common sense for some people, but it can be surprisingly difficult for some.